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What makes a Vancouverite?

August 7th, 2012 · 92 Comments

Inspired by the recently celebrated B.C. Day, which came with attendant essays on what makes this province unique and worth bragging about, I’ve decided we need a Vancouver Day, with guidelines on how you can tell a true Vancouverite (whether here for five days or five generations) from a mere visitor.

Plus, we all need a chance to be silly.

Here is my kickstarter and highly idiosyncratic list about what defines someone as a Vancouver native:

– Knows the difference between West Vancouver, the West End, and the west side of Vancouver

– Never bothers to carry an umbrella in any weather. What are Gore-Tex jackets with hoods for?

– Pronounces Vancouver as “Vangcouver,” a strange but true Canadianism I’ve noticed.

– Has a strong opinion about cycling, one way or the other

– Does not think there’s anything strange or unusual about butter-chicken poutine.

– Has waited more than four hours in a ferry line-up, at some point.

– Knows where there is a decent wild blackberry patch

Additions?

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  • trixie

    Knows that North Vancouver is located due east of West Vancouver.

  • Raingurl

    What makes a Vancouverite? I’d say anyone that can put up with rats year after year.

    http://vancouver.mediacoop.ca/photo/tired-rats-and-demolition-disaster-dtes-community-challenges-city-hall-act/11712

  • IanS

    Someone who’s wiling to pay close to $4 for a cup of coffee several times a week.

  • Sean Nelson

    Has ridden a trolley bus.

  • trixie

    Knows where Second and Third Beach are, but is unconcerned that there is no First Beach.

  • trixie

    Knows that Lost Lagoon is easily found.

  • Editor, REW.ca

    Can’t get through an entire conversation without mentioning the Vancouver real estate market.

  • Sharon

    Knows that South Granville is not at 70th Avenue – that’s Marpole!

  • trixie

    Understand, but rarely talks about, DTES / SRO.

  • Tim Bray

    Orders in sushi & pizza for kids’ birthday parties.

  • Carlos

    Understands pretty much every GIF on this website:

    http://definitelyraining.tumblr.com/

  • Raingurl

    RE: 9 trixie // Aug 7, 2012 at 3:33 pm

    Understand, but rarely talks about, DTES / SRO.

    Maybe if we did start talking about it, DTES wouldn’t be a problem anymore.

  • Raingurl

    Thanks to development is STILL able to use the term “I’m going to shop at Woodward’s” (that’s one of my favourite terms)

  • Cara

    Someone from Vancouver understands the phrase ‘creme de la creme’ and starts to roll their eyes.

  • Agustin

    Awesome list!

    How about: someone who loves Luongo when he’s wearing red and white, but can’t stand him in green, white, and blue?

    Or, to build on a few themes: someone who’s gone walking on the beach and skiing in the same day, then went immediately home to call all his relatives in the rest of the country to rub it in? (Or posted it on Facebook, if you’re one of those.)

  • trixie

    Sends daffodil pix to relatives in Saskatoon.

  • Frank Ducote

    Cara @ 14: Now that’s a Vancouverite all right!

    A real Vancouverite knows more about planning than (fill in the blank) and architecture than (ditto). And transit, and land economics and ad nauseum…

  • gmgw

    The late Denny Boyd (who True Vancouverites of a certain age will recall as the Sun’s longtime items/gossip/saloon columnist, back when newspapers still had such things– Boyd inherited the position from the semi-legendary Jack Wasserman) used to regularly do columns on this topic, probably when he got bored. The only one of his aphorisms I can recall claimed that True Vancouverites always drove (slowly) around Stanley Park Drive when returning from the North Shore via the Lions Gate Bridge, rather than along the faster-but-duller Park causeway. I remember being pleased to read that, as I’d already been doing it for years; it’s a habit I picked up from my father. Of course, I was born and grew up in North Vancouver, which might disqualify me as a True Vancouverite– although my father was born in Vancouver, in 1912– so perhaps I’m one by default. (You want to know how to spot a True North Vancouverite? One who speaks of going to Vancouver as “going overtown”. )

    Incidentally, anyone who spends four hours or more in a ferry lineup isn’t a True Vancouverite, necessarily– more likely they’re merely either too stupid or too cheap to make a reservation.
    gmgw

  • Frances Bula

    @GMGW. I’m not too cheap so it must be that I’m too stupid. I don’t travel a huge amount on the ferries, so I’m always shocked to discover what a chaotic system it is that has people waiting for hours and hours.

  • West End Gal

    One that buys a house on the corner of Prior St. & Dunlevy Ave, facing Prior… 7-8 years ago, a house that was so derelict, that the raccoons refused to live there… with floors smelling of dog pee… and mold all over. Then sank some money in, repaired it… and now hold big signs in their windows saying that the Dunsmuir/ Georgia Viaducts are ruining their “neighborhood” for the past 40 years. NIMBY assholes like these, yeah… makes a Vancouverite.

  • Raingurl

    Frances, you’re not too stupid………I’ve waited in ferry lineups for at LEAST three hours on several occassions (I’m a TRUE ISLAND GIRL transplanted to this lovely place we call the mainland) and it had nothing to do with being stupid nor cheap. Sometimes ferries break down and sometimes you miss them by a whisker because of (STUPID) Vancouver traffic. A TRUE Vancouverite would KNOW that. *wink*

  • Jake

    Apparently Vancouverites generally identify themselves to other British Columbians and Canadians by prefacing whatever they are about to say on call-in radio with the following: “I’m from Vancouver and I’m appalled that xyz”. Frankly I’m appalled that CBC’s This is That has yet to lampoon this.

  • Cedarwaxwing

    I’m from Vancouver and I’m appalled at the cheap and gratuitous dig at vancouverites.

  • Mayna

    Brings up the weather – good or bad – in the first five minutes of any conversation.

  • gmgw

    @ Frances:
    I recommend ferry reservations. They add to the cost, but they also add immeasurably to your peace of mind if you’re trying to make the 9 PM out of Swartz Bay at the end of a holiday weekend and have to be at work the next day (as long as you get to the terminal the required 30 minutes in advance, of course). Plus you’re first on/first off. Plus it calms spouses who are prone to be excessive worriers to the point of having panic attacks. Of course, it will frequently happen that you make your reservation and then find no lineups at the terminal, but that falls into the same realm of magical reality as carrying an umbrella to ensure that it doesn’t rain, another mysterious phenomenon with which True Vancouverites are intimately familiar… just to get back on topic, sort of.
    gmgw

  • Darren

    I don’t count as a true Vancouverite because I’ve only been here 20 years and still won’t sit on a restaurant patio in pouring March rain under a beach umbrella wrapped in scarf and jacket while drinking cold beer. If it’s Sunday, it’d be a Cesar. And I don’t get those either…

  • F.H.Leghorn

    A True Vancouverite: Hates Toronto (usually with several good reasons).

  • gmgw

    @F.H. Leghorn #25:
    Whenever I’ve been to Toronto, I inevitably encounter at least one local who, should I divulge that I’m from Vancouver, will regard me with great consternation and urgently inquire: “Vancouver?! Why would you want to come *here*??”
    There are many ways to answer that question, but it’s kind of sad/funny that they feel compelled to ask it.
    gmgw

  • Silly Season

    Knows ALL the ‘secret’ driving route shortcuts around town, that will get them from A to B MUCH faster.

    And no, I’m not telling you, ’cause if you were a real Vancouverite, you’d already know…

  • Silly Season

    Knows what “Peter’s”, “The Aristocrat” and “On On” are referencing.

  • Joe Just Joe

    A true Vancouverite doesn’t walk under canopies with their umbrella open.

    A true Vancouverite has seen trolley poles be reattached so many times that they’d have no problem doing it themselves.

    A true east Vancouverite over 25 knows what a deluxe and chuck wagon are.

    A true east Vancouverite almost never pays for the Skytrain, but they feel guilty about it.

  • jesse

    A true Vancouverite knows where to find rainforests.

  • Silly Season

    Knows the REAL length of Kits Pool and swims there in all kinds of weather, from Opening Day, to whatever date the Mayor decides constitutes Closing Day (and if you swam there last year at the end of season, you’ll know to what THAT references. Grrrr).

  • John

    Doesn’t really care or think about it…

  • Grant

    A true Vancouverite lets the lawn go to seed, but is out with shovel and salt as soon as a quarter-inch of slush falls in the winter.

  • Raingurl

    @ Grant // Aug 8, 2012 at 9:19 am

    I’ve already got my snow shovel, toque and gloves cleaned and ready! LOL and I signed up for the Snow Angels program to help out seniors who can’t shovel their own walk.

  • David

    You have to carry an umbrella to ensure it doesn’t rain. A true Vancouverite knows that having one tucked away in a bag doesn’t count.

    I loved the comment about the trolley poles, so true! True Vancouverites, even some high paid professionals, are willing to take the bus.

    A true Vancouverite finds north by looking for the mountains.

    An old Vancouverite remembers being kept awake at night by the sound of the Pt. Atkinson fog horn.

  • rf

    A true Vancouverite thinks 700 sq ft is a large 1 bedroom, and at under $500,000 is cheap.

  • Julia

    A true Vancouverite never tires of those crisp mornings when you wake up to see fresh snow on the north shore mountains.

    A true Vancouverite is doing something outdoors 10 minutes after the rain stops – regardless of season.

  • Joseph Jones

    A true Vancouverite know that the only real economic activity is demolition and rebuilding – and in between, remediation.

  • brilliant

    -Wears shorts in February as soon as the sun makes an appearance, no matter what the temperature.
    -Uses an umbrella when it snows.

  • Rainbaby

    “Butterflies” on the home stretch as the descent begins above the mountains and starts into that left roll-out over the Pacific and back towards the runway while contemplating that familiar (rain) water we walk on….

  • tedeastside

    being angry , unfriendly and hoarding your money makes you a true vancouverite

  • Paul T.

    A true Vancouverite knows:

    when the tents go up in Vanier Park, summer is around the corner.

    a high of 15 degrees for more than 2 days is considered a heat wave.

    they are happier splashing around in puddles than sweating in +20 degree heat.

    that no matter what the government announcement (any level), it’s probably going to cost them money.

    that the weather report is there solely for entertainment purposes, much like horoscopes.

  • tedeastside

    Knows vancouver has industry but pizza by the slice and marijuana

  • Mira

    LOL, what makes a Vancouverite?
    Vancouverite … only Vancouver Museum, can tell you that! No such a thing as a true Vancouverite anymore, they’ve been all replaced by true Shanghaians! 🙁

  • rf

    I was wondering how long it would be before someone “went there.”

  • Plangal

    Knows all of the lyrics to the BC Lions song “Come on and roar you lions roar” and the Whitecaps song “White is the Colour” and knos that the Canucks do not have a song.

    Was a proud member of the Sun Ray Club.

    Took free swim lessons ( or taught free swim lessons) from the Vancouver Sun.

    Caught a salmon in the Sun Free Salmon Derby!

    (I was a Pacific Press brat…)

  • Julia

    pretty pathetic Mira.

    You know you are a Vancouverite when you make a big deal about being born here.

  • Raingurl

    Yeah, that was pretty pathetic Mira. This city and railroad were built by the blood of immigrant workers. My mother and her family were (are) immigrants. The only reason they don’t have to listen to racist, redneck, IGNORANT comments like yours is because they’re from a white European country…………..You know you’re a true Vancouverite when you can pretty much gauge the weather on when the PNE starts. tee hee.

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